Family Reunion!

Hello, Prey! I'm back, did you miss me? I missed you and your wonderful flavors, but I am home now, back to the sweet Wolfy's Woods!

When I last wrote I was running and running, trying to find my family, and see if I even had one! Well, turns out I do. I found a couple humans who have MAD ( Multiple Avatar Disorder) just like my human, Isa. Their MAD also included wolves and as things would have it, one was a blue male wolf and one was a red female wolf and they told me their daughter, a purple wolf, had jumped into the mind of some random human when she was just a pup. They've been looking for me! It was a fun time with lots of howls and eating of bunnies!

I wanted to stay with them, but I missed Handsome Wolf something awful, so I convinced them to run back with me. We all jumped into my human, Isa's, head. She wasn't very happy at first but said we could all stay if we promised to take regular flea baths. (I don't know what it is about her and fleas. Doesn't she know they are good for your fur?)  There was much rejoicing with my family and we try to take over as much as possible, but that human is pretty strong.

So when we got home, the delicious smell of bunny was wafting up from below. Seems my good friend Katie was having a bunny roast on the ground. I helped her out by catching a couple more bunnies ( I think one was named Kathy) and added them to the spit. Katie isn't a bad cook, not as good as me of course, but not bad. After we all had our fill of bunny, we headed back to the woods for some sleep.

Come visit Club United on Saturday nights in the Second Life Grid, 5-7pm SLT (Pacific time USA) to see more of our antics.

PRESTEGUSTIDIGITATIUNUSS MUSEUME OF WOLF HISTORY

   Wolf history has been researched by the voices in the purple mushrooms in Wolfy's Woods.  These voices are actually super-intelligent (although totally insane) aliens from another galaxy.  They watched earth TV on the way here, but got addicted to The Smurfs.  So it was natural for them to take up residence in the nearest mushrooms.  When Wolfy wandered by one day, they recognized the potential.  Well, not the potential for intelligence, but for more living space.  They live in the large empty area in his head not taken up by his brain.

   The Voices (registered alien trademark) have found that wolves evolved from elephants at about the time that Earth's moon, Titan, abandoned the planet and the current moon took over.  When men disobeyed God's commandment not to eat the fruit, the earth went downhill very quickly.  There were several things that happened besides Adam and Eve being given the boot by God.

   1. Those _____________ (fill in the blank) people who eat strange food and don't look like us
       moved in in droves.
   2. Real estate prices dropped out of sight.
   3. Weeds started growing in everyone's front yard.
   4. The moon, Titan, decided to move out and live in prime retirement property near Saturn.
   5. The current moon, Luna, sneaked in across the border to try to get on welfare.
   6. The elephants, who loved eating tomatoes from the tops of trees, became allergic to alligators.

   That last was catastroffic - catboxic - very bad!  An elephant would find a nice hard green tomato in a tree and suck it into his trunk.  An allagator would walk by.  The elephant would hop down from the top of a tree and turn to say, "Hi" to the alligator, and AHHH - AHHHH - BOOM! One allagator with a hole in it.  Then a human who happened to wander by saw this happen and got the idea to put holes in other humans.

Howler

Howler was a great inventor. He appeared by magic one day in a square blue tree that bellowed like an elephant with a stuck tomato, near a group of wolves having dinner next to a pile of wood. (See the Saturday, August 20, 2016 post "History Repeats It's Self")

In one afternoon, Howler discovered lightning, fire, and gourmet cooking.  He then went back into his tree and disappeared.

Limpy

Limpy invented the wheel. He banged on a large rock until it was round, yet flat on both sides. To see what it would do, he put it on top of a big boulder. The problem was that the boulder wasn't quite flat. He then stood under it to see what it would do.  It rolled off the boulder and landed on his paw.  After that, for safety, the pack alpha decreed that all wheels must be square.  That's why now all wolf built wagons have square wheels.












The Purple Pumpernickle


     Born on the planet Lupis, fourth planet from the little dog star, Canis Minorus, PP was known as  Dum-Wof the son of a mad scientist,  Krak-Pot and his mad wife Ol-Bat (she once bit him).  Dum-Wof was put on an experimental space craft by his father, and mother, just before his home planet exploded from radioactive gas produced by grinding all the planet's forests into newspapers.

     Landing in a cat box, he was found by a humble cat herder and his wife who adopted him as their pet.  On their cat ranch, Dum-Wof developed the secret identity of Wolfy, humble snarfer of bunnies, mainly because he thought it was "cool".

     Now, as the Purple Pumpernickel, he uses his super powers for good (for wolves).  Whenever wolves anywhere are threatened, the humble Wolfy dives under the nearest sofa and emerges as the Purple Pumpernickle!  Defender of the weak!  Snarfer of bunny snacks!  Protector of spoof, just-us-wolves, and the Lupine way!


 "Look!  Up in the sky!  It's a bird!  It's a plane!  No!  It's that Dum-Wof!"

In search of....

Adoring prey, I realize it has been so long since I addressed you, you probably feel like I lost my appetite. I apologize, I'll begin hunting you again soon.

So much has happened since last I wrote, that it will take too long to share. Suffice it to say that Handsome Wolf and I have been on grand adventures, some of which he will share with you, and we have had lots of fun events.

During the last of these events, where we were recounting the Wolf Tale of 'The Wolf  Who Cried Boy', I was dancing with Handsome Wolf, and looking around at the families gathered. I suddenly realized I don't have a family. Where is my family? I was in my human's mind for so long, do I even 'have' a family?

So I did what any Purple Wolf would do, I got out my sonic screwdriver and started to fix the Tardis. This project was taking too long so I started to run. And I've been running, looking for my family, since. I paused to let you know that I am ok, and when I return to you, dear prey, I will cook some of you in celebration, and I will share what I have learned if anything.

So dear prey, eat, drink, fatten up for our feast, (well, except of course for Prince Delvin and his protected bunnies) and I will return to enjoy your tasty meat with tales to tell you!

Until then, this is DJ Wolfette, running off.