The Night of Wolfy's Birth

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro' the house

Not a creature was stirring, we'd eaten the last mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

We had no children, but my wife was quite round;

Well not since lunch last Friday when that boy came around;

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I raised up my head, and planned venison stew,

I heard a scream and tiny wolf howl too.

Then out from the fireplace came thumpings and growls,

And a tiny wolf body landed head-first with howls.

Santa sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

I HATE THAT WOLF HOUSE - THAT PUP GAVE ME SUCH A BITE!

(With abject apologies to Clement Clarke Moore for wolfizing his poem)

I can't remember much about my birth, but I do remember a lump on my head. Happily wolves have solid skulls - all the way through.

To end the story of my birth, I was dropped down the chimney on my head. Luci, the club owner, says that explains everything about me. Santa and my father eventually became friends. That was before dad and mom ate his original team of reindeer.

Anyway, last Saturday the creatures at Club United (otherwise known as The Asylum) threw me a birthday party. Everyone had a wonderful time and they even had a fire extinguisher just in case. I don't know why, but our club fire insurance has been very high recently. My tail has caught fire several times, usually after I wash it. I don't know why. I keep it clean and shiny by rubbing It with gasoline.

In spite of peril of either fire or cooking pot, almost all the creatures in Wolfy's Woods attended. I never realized how many adoring prey and pack mates I had. Wolfette baked a lovely bunny cake with left-over elephant frosting, and the Squirrel Cola flowed freely. Even two of the bunnies were there. For some reason, both were armed with huge swords. I was almost in tears when they asked me to sit in a throne so they could get a shot of me. There are still several holes in the chair, but I patched the one in my hat. I still have a new part in the fur on my head, though.